If you've been successful in ignoring the marketing crap the NHL puts out in the crappy months I apologise for this hitting your retinae. I'm pretty sure the NHL is mocking us.
Background: the NHL hired Stan Lee (yes - of Marvel Comics fame) to develop "Guardians" for each team. Here are ours.
- Super Agility. Apparently Stan Lee has not watched a Senators game this year.
- Mind Control. Ok, this one I get - Mike Fisher seems to have the ladies of Ottawa in a permanent dreamy-eyed daze.
- Chlorinetric communication. What the fuck?
- Mass Manipulation. Yeah, that explains Leaf Nation pretty well.